(no subject)

[cimorene]

The ensign shifted uncomfortably. "I was wondering if you had any plans."

The helmsman's smile broadened evily. "I might."

The navigator frowned. "Nothing elaborate, I hope."

wow, it's been a long time since i've seen such a bad instance of appositive syndrome as this. i didn't get more than a few paragraphs in. how can you write like that, let alone read it?

eta: there are only two people in that conversation.

Comments

[ajodasso.livejournal.com]

eta: there are only two people in that conversation.

That's hilarious.

[alpheratz.livejournal.com]

Oh man. It's okay to say "said." Really.

[perhael.livejournal.com]

*drops dead*

i think i've just been killed by bad writing.