new csi:ny fic, "the scientific method", nc-17

[cimorene]

ooohkay.  the frivolous little fic that was supposed to just be porn and got away from me!  finally finished. 

the scientific method, by cimorene,  122 K
csi: new york
mac/danny, nc-17
many thanks to kyuuketsukirui for two betas, both remarkably quick.  also to perhael for cheerleading, wax_jism for a once-over, and stellaluna_ for certain character discussions.

"What happened?"

Danny just looks at her. "He tied my tie, Aiden."

She lifts her hands apologetically, "Hey, I'm not asking for a re-enactment."

I am, Danny thinks before he can stop himself. He takes a drink instead of massaging his forehead.

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/stellaluna_/]

Later on, I need to attempt to provide more detailed (or at least more coherent) feedback, but for now let me just say that I love this. A lot. The excerpts I'd read previously were even greater in context, and all the details are fantastic. The tie-tying! And Danny's detailed study of Mac's various facial expressions and reactions. And *happy* he is when he finally figures it all out, even if it *does* start to go all wrong for a few minutes there. And kissing in the rain. And the uber-hot lovin'.

I am delighted. I'm just not articulate. But this was very much worth the wait.

[cimness.livejournal.com]

oh. thank you! yay. i'm glad you liked it. i love mac's facial expressions. and my beta was like, "what was the kissing in the rain, is that in an episode or something? i assume that will make sense to people who've seen the show?" and i had to be like "uh, no. it's just um, a kink."

we can, like, trade. i owe you feedback--as soon as i finished this story i read your last one, but i didn't feel up to composing complete sentences about it. i thought it was even better than "light from a dead star"; i really liked your danny. and i loved awkward mac and eager-to-please mac and danny's priceless reactions to them. and the way danny argued with himself.

[http://users.livejournal.com/stellaluna_/]

Kissing in the rain is an *excellent* kink. I totally buy Mac hanging out on the roof in the middle of a rainstorm. Plus, it set up that excellent scene with Danny slipping and falling and Mac catching him. I love how it just pings in Danny's brain that oh, shit, *Mac wants him*, and he dives in & goes for the kiss. And how Danny's amazing sense of *want* just comes through, how much he wants Mac pretty much any way he can have him.

And yes, trading feedback = definitely good. I'm still attempting to find my brain, because I'm not doing too well with the complete sentences right now, either. It's all coming out as Danny/Mac kissing yay! and naked yay! Which is *true*, but not particularly articulate. I'm glad you liked "Sunday," too; I liked it better than "Star" myself. It was *really* fun to write Danny's reactions to Mac, and poor Mac struggling to actually say what's on his mind, for once, and *wanting* to make Danny happy instead of just backing off from the situation. Danny arguing with himself is also fun. In the next story, I *really* get to abuse them make their lives interesting.

[cimness.livejournal.com]

i wonder what it *is* about the rain. obviously some people, like the beta for this story, don't feel the attraction. but rain is totally sexy to me. mmmh.

i was thinking vaguely about writing you feedback today but i still don't feel coherent. well, maybe tomorrow. i think danny's voice was my favourite thing about your story, which is funny because it was my favourite part about writing my own story and they're recognisably quite *different* dannies (for instance, my danny's kind of more--distracted and nervous, and your danny's a bit jaded and conscious of his jadedness).

i just love seeing characters be impatient with the slowness or dumbness of other characters around them because, i guess, it's fun to identify with (which maybe says that i'm not a very nice person, but whatever). so danny's exasperation filled me with glee, and also it was so cute because you could tell mac's painful awkwardness and eagerness to please didn't exactly pain him for entirely the reason he thought they did. and also his persistent attempts to think the worst of mac's motives--hilarious.

[http://users.livejournal.com/stellaluna_/]

Oh god, I'm still so *not* coherent myself. Between being sick and trying to actually work and being in an "eek! going out of town!" semi-frenzy, I've had little-to-no brainspace to actually come up with words in a way that will make sense. So. Yes. Feedback soon. See, and the thing is, I really like *your* Danny, too. They're not the same Danny, but they're both versions of Danny that I *believe* in, if that makes sense. If you start at canon!Danny as mile zero, you can see where the divergences happen, but they're both still good ways of getting to the same place -- and I just lost control of that metaphor, but my heart was in the right place. Anyway, I love your Danny's nervous distraction throughout, and I *really* like how he struggles through his epiphany when he's trying to tell Mac everything he's figured out. Plus, Danny wanting to understand Mac, and Mac realizing that? Makes me so happy.

Heh. I get a kick out of characters' impatience, too, probably making me *also* not a nice person, but oh well. But it's so much fun to write about characters who desperately need a quarter to buy a clue, and to see the impatience with that mirrored in those around them. It's even more amusing when they're impatient, and at the same time desperately need a smack with the clue stick themselves. And Danny (my Danny) is just so bound & determined to shoot himself in the foot.

[cimness.livejournal.com]

yeah, although i think my danny's possible existence is doubtful sometime after 1x16 or so. i like to think of him diverging at "till death do we part". ahahaha, i liked your metaphor. ♥

and oh! the scene with aiden in the diner, and the running scene at the beginning. both beautifully vivid, a real sense of place. i don't know for sure that that comes from your having lived in new york, but i suspect it. i always feel much happier with places that i know. and i love really imaginable settings and surroundings and things.

i think canon danny is totally bound and determined to shoot himself in the foot too. he's getting pretty crazy in latter episodes, and i see you working hard to integrate all of that and explain it and stuff and um. stay close to him, like. kudos for that! i love reading it, but my personal impatience with latter-canon-danny i think would prevent me from writing him.