(no subject)

she's worried about the paper being too long. gah. i just want to be finished with it. 3.2 pages=5? *hopeful look* no? well! it might be 4 by the time i finish making that last paragraph into complete sentences, as opposed to the apparent wreckage of a brainstorm.

sample: Novels--all about expectations therein. That's what she's really talking about, but you can extend it, to a certain degree, to society, as novels are a product thereof. Fulfilling expectations without ever perfectly matching them, ie, the general's lack of good breeding, the ease with which they get to get married. Her parents are matter-of-fact. Gender roles and the expectations of them. Catherine to cry! Eleanor, since henry's banishment. Catherine to have her share in henry's property. The bit about introducing another character just drew attention to her deus ex machina maneuver.

urrrrrrrg.

getting drunk is looking more attractive all the time.

(no subject)

lisa and her boyfriend are SO FUCKING CUTE. oh with the cute already-marriedness!

awwwwwwww. awwwwwwww.

<--dies

<--is thereby excused from finishing the essay

(no subject)

now i just need a conclusion.

do you think she'll notice if it's just the introduction backwards?

--heh. i'm really spamming this lj tonight, aren't i? ...which is saying a lot, for me.

i know you must remember the scent of my shampoo, the taste of my lipgloss--but i remember things to

so last night, when i was SUPPOSED to write my essay, instead decided to write bad crush poetry. oops. i mean, LOVE poetry. for the first time in 3 years. there's a reason i haven't written poetry since i acquired taste.

<--not a poet

heh. for your amusement and edification. what should i cut to make it less unwieldy?

this (03/02/02)

When you sear me,
Search me
With your poetry.
I fall into the lush mouth of
Under-pink, ripe, and rosy,
And I dream of your welcome
Beyond these bleak fissures of
Every day
When you will smile, and not laugh,
Because the burning of that smile
Scars inside your ribs
Like the desperate clawing
Of a small animal seeking shelter.
You will not kiss me
Because the dream is stronger
Than the mirage of my face swimming before you.
I will not vanish at your touch,
But you will fear it,
In the face of a moment's flawed beauty.
Take me with the broken ends of your fingernails,
The scarred edges of your pity,
The husks of fear and hate.
Take me with the translucent tatters of blue that veil the edges of you,
And I will find you through them.
Give me what you will
And I will make of it
The breath of laughter
That trembles my throat and my wrists
And the backs of eyelids when the sun flings aside a cloud.
If you have not laughed for me,
Laugh at me,
And let me gather the dregs of your laughter.
You will not hear; I witness your solitude
In the breaking spreading stain of my own
And I do not reach out
Only to shatter all.
Once you looked over your shoulder.
Shadows paint laugh lines on your cheeks
And this hitch in my chest
Catches wind from the air,
Cups the bubbles of uncertainty
And spills them, and I watch, and you weep.
Out of nothing, this.

grrrrrrr

breakfast and my stomach had a disagreement. have a feeling this will really start to suck around 11.

medicine is prob. responsible for my zinginess despite 5 hrs' sleep, so i forgive it.

on the + side: v. good hair day. ah, the wonders of conditioner.

(no subject)

the ground outside my dorm is covered with communist slogans in colored chalk. haha! made my day, totally.

the single high point of the gothic novel.

homosexual panic in shelley's frankenstein: verdict: frankenstein bad, professor AWESOME

(no subject)

in other news, the ex appears to have gone insane. that is all.

have been a fool for lesser things

1. i do not at all approve of my friends having lives. they should all do nothing all day so i would not be forced to transcribe linguistics homework or finish the k/s vignette. *gnashes teeth* i am so. fucking. tired. of the k/s vignette.

2. essay about jane austen in the style of jane austen: cool, not cool? you decide. That essay won me a perfect grade, a lot of compliments from the teacher, and an entire lecture devoted to her making the class read it out loud and explaining to them analytically how awesome I was. Too bad I lost the essay when moving computers later...

3. someone remind me loudly that i cannot write poetry. say it with me: "you cannot write poetry. you suck at poetry."

4. have v. little appetite. is it bad to have eaten only one meal yesterday and one meal today? i think it is. i cannot lose any more weight. *worry worry* but but. i put the food in my mouth and it tastes like. nothing. i'm totally not hungry. goddamned medicine.

5. have decided all my subject lines will be lyrics when i can't think of anything.

6. got email from k'sal!!! my first charming and urbane penpal, prior even to the inestimable ravie. she still loves me! even if she did call me a valley girl.

7. i'm not, like, a valley girl, am i?

díme acaso adónde vas ahora que no estoy--díme acaso adónde voy ahora que no estás

why is it that in spanish, you memorize the verb endings, and it's like, "oh," and you don't even have to think to process it.

and in greek the goddamned things just sit there like this. fucking. goddamned. jumble. on the. paper. uhm.

i think this means instead of "sleep; japanese test; work; linguistics meeting" my schedule for tomorrow looks like "homework; review session; japanese test; work; linguistics meeting."

thursday is the day i don't have to do anything.

right?

rightthisway problems

EEP! all of a sudden can't get into my website! <--i mean, the ftp program can't connect to it to upload. aaaaaagh!

hopefully that means it's down, and not that my school has suddenly acquired firewalls or something.

*nibbles on lip* help? wisdom?

and the Word came to Canada.

cimorene111: actually i think everyone is bi in the whole universe
cimorene111: except george dubya
GhettoHobbit: Dubya
cimorene111: the prez
cimorene111: the shrub
GhettoHobbit: I know, its just funny
GhettoHobbit: The shrub?
cimorene111: bush=shrub
cimorene111: small bush.
cimorene111: *shrug*
GhettoHobbit: Oh yes, duh