(no subject)

i usually agree with total film. we love the same type of thing. we're totally agreed on singin in the rain and starsky and hutch, king arthur, finding nemo, the manchurian candidate and kill bill, to name a few.

so when they give aladdin five stars, i have to reconsider my opinion. since childhood, plots which depend for the villain's power on the hero or heroine's idiocy have always driven me bananas. any fool could tell from the first moment, for instance, that the princess wasn't going to react poorly to the peasant thing, and on top of that he's disregarding the advice of a semi-omnipotent being by making up his lame lies? i could never rejoice whole-heartedly in the end because i thought jasmine was obviously too smart for him.

then again, almost all disney plots rely on this idiotic device, even when the fairytales they're taken from don't--the little mermaid, for instance, wherein ursula turns king whatsisface into a sad bit of seaweed and wastes a good forty seconds cackling maniacally while his crown and trident sit around on the ocean floor. the princess is closer to them than the witch, but she sits frozen staring at them like the dumbass she is until the witch is COMPLETELY finished with her little seizure and grabs them herself. leaving aside the question of how smart it is for all the magical power of the ruler to go to whoever is physically touching these two items, all the brat had to do was catch them--they were in arm's reach if i recall--while ursula was doubled over by her own cleverness!

i've always hated beauty and the beast so passionately that i can't remember whether there's a similar plot flaw, but i'm willing to bet on it.

anyway, regardless of this reserve, i've always loved aladdin. my usual practice was to read a book through the second half or just plain leave the room when the idiocy got too much to bear, but i've loved the beginning, anyway. and regardless of my inability to sit through the whole thing, the extras sound cool in the total film review.

alexander

alexander was both highly gay and really terrible. i recommend seeing it for the gayness and for some entertaining stuff--angelina, for instance--that was not, strictly speaking, all that gay.

eta: also, jared leto was incredibly hot. it's hard for me to reconcile hotness with smearing snot on you, hollsk. he was probably very high at the time. maybe he's a universal asshole, but he can act.