crack au report

i am actually pretty much done with the archive now, so this is the last crack au report. i'm sure there are some more crack aus at the archive which i didn't read, but i'm probably not going to read them, either.

• (one of the ones) where bodie is an elf - who can, in this instance, read minds and teleport miniscule amounts of liquid, and explains all about Elf School and the origin of the idea that elves are immortal. i kind of thought you people who mentioned these were making them up. on the plus side this is the first one i've read of what is reputedly a large subgenre. 


• what amounts to another subgenre that looks almost just like canon, except that cowley is inexplicably bodie's father and everyone has a loving fluffy relationship around it. more of these than you can shake a stick at can be found at anne higgins's author page. i've never seen anyone else do it.


• the one where bodie's an ancient egyptian and doyle is a maaaaagical atlantean (you can tell by the slanted eyes!) and both are sold as slaves to crete. who bond over doyle's incredible jumping-over-a-bull acrobatics and run away together.


• the one where bodie's a sailor and doyle's a cross-dressing cabin boy who seduces him in a bar. it's hard to figure what period this is supposed to be, but that's the least of the crack involved.


• the one where doyle seduces bodie the teenaged - um, something? - at a masked orgy/ball full of whores in the 18th century and then leaves him and bodie gets rather obsessed with him. this one might be trying to say something, but i'm not sure what.