hmmm.

Werewolf epic at about 33,000. Frank is still 13.

I feel ridiculous, of a sudden, posting just that, so. Um.

I have gotten addicted to Tetris in the weeks bexless was gone because she is the cheerleader for this particular story and I'm a creature of habit and couldn't write it alone. I've done it in the past and hopefully I will do it again, but right now it feels like talking to nobody. It's not that I'm good at Tetris. I suck at video games. But I just can't stop when I start! I played it several times until my vision blurred and I couldn't put the blocks down where I wanted, but always one space to the left.

Also, I've been craving Taffel Herrgårds potatischips, which lately taste to me like fucking ambrosia, possibly even better than fresh guacamole (previously the most heavenly flavour in my personal cuisine pantheon). And I couldn't buy any because of the stores closing early on Saturday (for the sabbath?). Then last night I boiled some late new potatoes and ate them with butter and poached eggs and about three tablespoons of salt (I don't know, okay? It's a craving), and it tasted almost potato-chip-like. It was good.

And I wrote again, too. Then I slept 11 hours.

Swedish Idol

And, okay, so remember like, two weeks ago when I was all, I can't understand how anyone can watch these TV idol shows! It's so painful!

Well, they are stupid. And the antics they do at judging time to torture the contestants until the last moment (are they in or out?) are even stupider than Project Runway's.

But the next time I went to noobsit I saw two eps in a row and then I wanted to know how it ended. Brother Windows and his wife are saving it for me now and last Friday I watched three episodes in a row. I totally Have Opinions too, even if I don't remember everybody's name. I am really sick of the female jury woman, too. She never likes the female singers and she always likes the male ones, even if they suck. Traitor.

In my defense, it's really hard to read while dandling a noob on your lap (or usually, your shoulder. Leon has a real talent for barfing on his shirt in the split second between when you decide to put him on your shoulder and when he lands there on the cloth diaper), but it's really easy to watch tv. There's a lot of tv-watching around noob-suppertime, 8-11 pm, at the House of Noob.

list of things that are not deep but are pretentious (and stupid)

In case you were writing something, maybe going for a dreamy or lyrical tone, and you were waffling - if you were asking yourself, "Yeah, self, I like that, but is it deep, or is it pretentious? Do I like it because it's poetic, or because of a little too much exposure to high school literary journals?" - this list may help you out. Think of it as a resource.

1. Creating new verbs by squishing together words that have nothing to do with each other and make no sense. Example: "Spreadmelt the peanut butter over the white bread." Minus extra points if the words are actually a contradiction in terms. Example: "Wakingupsleeping in slow, honey dribbles all the night."

2. Incomplete sentences. Example: "He showers and reaches for his toothbrush outside the hotwet enclosure feeling in the without and not checking to see if it's." Minus extra points if the incomplete thought is the end of a scene. Example: "She wishes she could, sometimes, but unfortunately - [scenebreak]"

3. Doing away with rules of punctuation for no good reason. Example: "Linderwall was a peaceful/prosperous place where the knights polished their armour every bluemoon, mainly for show, where the greatest event was when the occasional fairy godmother overcame her complacent ennui to become annoyed and cursed some unfortunate child and even then a princeprincess could usually be found to marry the unfortunate offspring, philosophers were highly respected and the number five was fashionable, but maybe, maybe in its simple prosperity and conservative pleasance in the harsh basketwoven high-lowing Cimorene, hated it."

4. Nonsense similes. Example: "Her hair hung over her forehead like the wiggly green tophat of a swollen butterfly larva anxious for the rain." Minus extra points for fused metaphors. Example: "Her eyes were fixed on the screen eagerly, winged, filled to bursting with the bittersweet savour of forgotten iced tea, the images seeping like bubbles bleeding desperately through the cracks in a frozen-thawed dishsoap:bottle of loneliness."

5. Unmotivated and inconsistent lack of capitalisation. Example: "John creases the takeout menu between nervous fingers and finally clenches hand on worn-plastic phone - the pizza place delivers, but not quickly. (spent hours waiting, endless hours of horror, nopizza, sad and hungry)"

6. Nonsense hyphenation. Example: "The dog slept on the smelly-plaid cushion and snored and occasionally drooled a bubble of dreamy drool onto the sad-grimy floor."

This was just so exciting I had to share.

Mint and camomile in pyramid teabags at last! ♥♥