in conclusion: elves

Apparently Neil Gaiman posted something in his blog about a factory in Iceland needing an "elf-free" certification. I didn't believe Wax that the Icelandic government actually officially believes in elves so I hit up Google.

In the Land of the Fairy King: Iceland's Elf School

...other road projects that have threatened hidden people’s homes have encountered unexplained equipment breakdowns and even illness and injuries to workers. There was even a time when the road works employed its own folklorist, to help deal with issues such as misplaced elves or soon-to-be-homeless hidden folk, who have been known to resort to sabotage.

. . .

Wax would like me to point out disclaimer-wise that what is apparently Iceland's national religion, more or less (54% of Icelanders are said to believe in the hidden folk), is no more ridiculous than any other religion or set of supernatural beliefs such as UFOs. It's true that the less you have heard of a set of supernatural beliefs, the more silly they seem to you. In fact, I suppose that from the point of view of an Icelander, the government's practical and official stance probably makes it a bit more sensible than, say, a UFO-chaser's belief system.

fruit vs fruitcake

A Berry Disturbing Makeover for Strawberry Shortcake

I like the new Strawberry Shortcake. It's a new version - it doesn't automatically make the classic cease to exist. Why do you have to choose sides? And here's a novel idea: not getting pissed off about remakes until the filmmakers actually go out and burn all the copies of the original and declare you a moron for liking it. Jezebel's Sadie, albeit not without an ironic nod to the fact that she's being swayed to irrationality by her nostalgia (though again: why is your nostalgia so, well, possessive? Just because you like an idea doesn't mean other people can't think about it and even disagree with you about it - and I loved Strawberry Shortcake too!), waxes outraged that the new Shortcake characters are going to focus less on desserts, and more on fruits. Heavens, no! Not FRUITS! Damn that politically correct media machine, trying to promote the eating of fruits and vegetables!

sneakers of the day

Vans "Wellesley" and Keds Studio by Keds Studio.

fuck bureacracy

Last time on bureaucracy fail theatre, I had a Bosslady who wanted to take me as an intern in the "work practice" program (employer accepts unqualified workers for on-the-job training & doesn't have to pay them, the government gives the workers unemployment). I went to the unemplyment office with all the necessary paperwork, having been cautioned by Bosslady that depending on who I talked to, they might be difficult.

That was more than a month ago. Obviously at the height of Finland's biggest memorable unemployment crisis, it's important that people who have already found work practice positions should have to wait as long as people who need actual help.

The purpose of work practice is either

1. As explained by the "No U Cant Has Job" camp: to find out whether you want a particular job, sort of like a test drive, so you can't have work practice for your former employers: you have already driven that car!


or


2. According to the website, the other camp, and logic: to find out whether a particular career or field is right for you, so that whether you can work somewhere depends on the commonsense difference between the case where a factory lays off its janitor and then wants to hire her back as a "work practice" gig, and the case where an adult who has worked as a substitute, oh, like, in some DAYCARE, is considering a permanent career change and wants more than a couple of weeks' experience on which to base the decision.

I had an argument prepared, but the caseworker didn't listen. In fact, she cut me off. Finnish people: they don't beat around the bush. So after a month of anxiety and depression I find my anxiety and depression... completely justified because I really can't go back to my dream job. Bosslady can't afford to hire another employee.

The caseworker was brisk and helpful about all kinds of other stuff, like the 20 pages I have to fill out to elaborate on the fact that I do freelance work but it does not exceed the minumum income for which you get taxed; the 20 pages to elaborate on how I am no longer in school because I QUIT; what kind of work I was thinking about (eg, the job that I have explained was the entire reason I went there); and whether I wanted to try work practice (idk, it's only the entire reason I came). And since I am interested in work practice - great! All I have to do is find a daycare to do the work practice at, that's fine (so it's fine for me to practice the exact job description, as long as I'm working for a different boss. AKA, you can work anywhere where they don't want you! That was the only English daycare in town.)

Aside from soliciting positions in Swedish daycares, she thinks my first item of business should be to learn Finnish (except this time hopefully it will stick! Maybe it will be for more than 1 hour a week and the teacher won't hate all students, thus inspiring in me a Pavlovian anxiety-response to the act of studying Finnish - you think? It could happen). The unemployment bureau offers their own, in-house Finnish courses! And even though they have a long waiting list they have no idea when the next one will be... but you can't take one from an alternate source that might have an actual schedule without your hypothetical unemployment benefits being cut off (mine don't start for 7 months anyway).

ETA: Besides not having the two twenty-page questionnaires available in English even though she is in the International Office (...), they don't even have them in Swedish, which is actually illegal in Finland. Two official languages? Hi, Finland! I'm the Swedish language! You contain 200,000 native speakers of me! You might recognise me because I've been in these parts SINCE BEFORE OLD GERMANIC TURNED INTO OLD NORSE.