plebefic summaries: “So you’re saying,“ Patrick blinks up at Pete, “That’d I’m the spawn of Satan?”

[cimorene]

It's a special summaries-only edition! Classic bandom is excellent for this. It's such a rich fount of crazy, contradictory, incomprehensible, infelicitous, ironic, bizarre, and just plain bad ideas.

1. Summary: He needs some fucking curtains.



2. Summary: Patrick studied the little sign quietly for a moment, the big red circle with a slash through it a too-late warning for the stick figure already halfway over the too-shallow water.



3. Chapter Summary: Gerard meets a fan who doesn't want his autograph. This doesn't settle with the coked-up singer.



4. Summary: Thizz - def. Ecstacy, MDMA, X. Drug taken when two horny boys want to "make up" a whole lot.
   Thizzface - def. The nasty looking face you make when you chew a pill, kinda like you're smelling something fowl.



5. Summary: “So you’re saying,“ Patrick blinks up at Pete, “That’d I’m the spawn of Satan?”

Comments

[effex]

[laughs and laughs at #4] But what *kind* of fowl? Let me tell you, the face you make when you smell chickens is totally different from the face you make when you smell swans (mostly because you are usually running the fuck away from swans while smelling them).

I would like to put forth the idea that #1 has, in fact, transcended plebe and emerged as awesome. What does he need the curtains for? And is the profanity superfluous or are the curtains actually fucking? I know I'm hooked.


It's a slow day at work.

[cimorene]

Yeah, #1 is in the realm not just of awesome, but the sub-awesome realm of "It totally qualifies as surrealist poetry". I would wear #1 on a t-shirt for sure.

I have seen swans without running away, but that was mostly because they did not choose to chase. When Wax and I made an abortive attempt to swim in the Baltic Sea last summer, there were some nearby swans that we dubbed George and Arlene who kept looking like they might be going to drift closer, and a close eye was kept on them the entire time. Fun fact: the swan is the national bird of Finland. I'm not sure why.

[effex]

Swans hate me. Or love to chase me, whichever. Maybe they can smell fear?

[effex]

#1 would make a fantastic t-shirt.