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cimoreneRemember this amazing Heroes badsex?
Well, so, that period in my life ended (because Matt and Mohinder, like, split up? Or something, idk, Heroes became too bad to keep up with) but all was not lost, because the previous record-holder for most horrifying badsex until I read that Star Wars fic where whoever-it-was "could not have been any harder if his erection were encased in plasticrete" [access-locked]is now writing Supernatural. Although her newer stuff wasn't nearly as hilarious. She seems to have gained some maturity, or maybe it's just that the rest of the fandom is so much worse.
All that unadulterated cream-and-coffee skin against white, with dark tangles at stern and midship, was just too delicious a contrast for Matt. His pants were strangling him.
cim: This paragraph is like a one-two-three punch of wtf? that knocks you out.
cim: BAM, cream-and-coffee skin! You're reeling!
lilah: Stern and midship? WHAT?
cim: Exactly! WHAM, stern and midship! What? you're staggering!
lilah: HIS PANTS WERE STRANGLING HIM!
cim: AND YOU'RE OUT COLD.
cim: WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?
lilah: I DON'T KNOOOOOOOOOOOOOW
cim: WHY ARE HIS PANTS SUDDENLY ANIMATE AND BENT ON MURDER? WASN'T THIS A BAD SEX SCENE A MINUTE AGO? WHAT HAPPENED? WHERE AM I?
Well, so, that period in my life ended (because Matt and Mohinder, like, split up? Or something, idk, Heroes became too bad to keep up with) but all was not lost, because the previous record-holder for most horrifying badsex until I read that Star Wars fic where whoever-it-was "could not have been any harder if his erection were encased in plasticrete" [access-locked]is now writing Supernatural. Although her newer stuff wasn't nearly as hilarious. She seems to have gained some maturity, or maybe it's just that the rest of the fandom is so much worse.
