up just slightly before dawn, which, whoa.

so i woke up a few hours ago with my neck all ickily stiff, and called my dog, and even though i let him underneath the blanket he was was still too cold, because i had the fan on. *pout* (and then went back to sleep, of course.)

okay, well, i dreamed i was in a play. part of the special effects were these odd pulley things which went out over the whole auditorium, starting high up in the back and, of course, slanting down to the stage. at the end they went haywire and random people started shooting down them when the whole cast was assembled at the front of the stage and we had to dodge them--for some reason we couldn't just run away. then i was on a tiny little fold-out couch in a living room somewhere with a friend [no one from rl] and my dad called needing me to do an errand, so i had to get my car and drive v. v. fast down this particular back route which leads to the house of my favorite korean babies--v. hilly, lots of hairpin turns and screens of trees and odd jogs where the residential roads cross the busier ones out of downtown. i drove, in both directions, up and down this route about three times, speeding as fast as i could, and there were other people in the car (?) and we were in a hurry because someone was going to die if we didn't do something, and when we passed the park i almost ran over some kids playing soccer.

in other news, i love both holls and aubry. my computer froze last night and i had to shut it down. i'm so sorry!

friends pages

it suddenly strikes me in a surreal manner that reading my friends page is a damn strange thing to do first thing in the morning.

also, some people have icons that i really, really, really hate. like, i'm so irritable that i want to email them and be like, "for fuck's sake, get a new icon! and this time leave off the stupid captions!" rrrrrr. <--fierce

so the food thing isn't working out. having a major disagreement with it, in fact. furthermore, i have to get up for real and take a shower soon, and i'm going out today. was really doing well with the writing last night. i got to page 8 despite staying up only till 1, which means more than half of it was written in the last two hours. inspiration was strong and heady--lifted a whole paragraph verbatim from my diary (ok, not verbatim, as had to make it more lyrical and change the pronouns etc.). well, anyway, that's satisfying.

yeah yeah. spam. so sue me.

i took a really transparent personality test, and the javascript was screwy, but i could still figure out

( what i and everyone else thinks about me and some other stuff )

wheee, good day!

do i love driving, or do i love driving? i LOVE driving. my cute little V6 car (well ok, little, if not cute), with the windows down and the bass making the rearview mirrors vibrate, and sunglasses and great dusky drifts of shadowy clouds rushing and fleeing across the sky--it's hurricane weather in Alabama, smelling like rain, damp and clean and white-skied and shaded, breezy at 76F.

played rap station, didn't speed more than 5mph above, beat everyone else away from every light. going shopping today, even though i have no money--but you can always justify expensive lipstick. hair is v. curly again b/c used the l'oreal conditioner i left here instead of my normal pantene. i may switch.

yesterday, i took some pictures of me and my dog, if you're interested. i'm not putting them in cutaway because they're too big, but:

[my dog pinned in mid-wrestle], [in the kitchen, with me in my maleficent costume sans headdress], and, of course, [looking at me and wondering why the hell i'm smiling. he doesn't realize how cute he is].

at least this time it's SHORT rambling.

not only do i eat in bed, but now my dog's eating in bed (my bed--not his. or. well. ours). ugh. need to change sheets.

lipstick has been achieved! bright red! and ate a sandwich, bringing my total for the day up to... a sandwich and a handful of crackers. :p

but i did get some writing done this morning.

(no subject)

what does one need to shrink images without cropping them?

anyone want to do it for me?

[edit: thanks! got it.]

i can't remember where i go

so, to recap the visit: my favorite person in the UNIVERSE is my cousin aubry. imagine. uhm. well, we've been since before either of us can remember, and we've never lived near. picture us, every time we meet, twice or three times a year since we were only a foot tall, waiting anxiously for the other, flying into each others' arms with little squeals. burying our faces in each other's hair and crying, sometimes, when we go.

she couldn't get off of work, and her parents are visiting without her, and it's just. very. very. surreal. i mean, i'm shut in my room all the time anyway, but if she were here... i wouldn't be alone.

so meanwhile, my "big sister," lisa. she's, uhm, 30-something? like, she was in graduate school when i was twelve. 34, 36? she was supposed to take me out this afternoon to talk. now, i can't talk about sex with my parents, really. i mean. they'd let me, but ew. no aubry. so i was DYING to see lisa and talk about sex.

she didn't show up because she thought aubry was here and she assumed i was busy. we talked on the phone instead, and the sex talk is postponed till thursday. i'm going slowly insane. i want to talk to kk desperately, as a stopgap (not to in any way insult her delightful conversation, which is utterly swishy and snuggle-worthy). furthermore, i want to write all of it out of me into this story and it's not. going.

i'm so. and i don't know if i feel good or bad, today. oh! i made a new icon, though. my mouth, or rather, my new red lipstick. well. my mouth too. but that's not the point.