J Crew classic satin ballet flats in Pale Peacock and Toasted Honey

[cimorene]

Sometimes I want to crash the national convention of professional color namers and smack them all with a giant wet, scaly dead fish, you know?

Comments

[dorothy1901]

I will get you that giant wet, scaly, dead fish if you will help me out against the wine reviewers who describe their wines as tasting like any kind of animal, vegetable or mineral except grapes. To them, a wine can have hints of mulberry, oak and seaweed, but never, ever taste of grape.

[krait]

THIS, SO MUCH. I laugh myself silly at the "tastes of cherries and raspberries with overtones of mahogany" sort of wine descriptions, because 1. if it tasted like cherries instead of like spoiled grapes, I would actually drink it, and 2. really, how many people go round the lumber yard licking planks often enough that they have any clue what "mahogany" tastes like and how it compares to "oak" or whatever?

[notemily]

I remember reading a review of various bottled waters when that started to become a thing in the 90s, with Volvic and Evian and the like. At the end of every review the guy would say "tastes like water."

[cimorene]

This is true, but that doesn't mean there aren't better and worse ones! I wouldn't put Evian high on the list, but Fiji is exquisite, and weirdly enough, that extra-oxygen artificial one that I can't remember the name of is also incredibly delicious, one of the best I've ever had. But my absolute favorite is Mountain Valley Spring, the water bottled in Hot Springs, Arkansas. I miss that water almost as much as I miss bagels and dill pickles and proper Mexican food.

[notemily]

Hee hee. I just thought it was amusing in light of the wine-description discussion. The reviewer did have specific things to say about each water. Personally I hate Dasani, but other than that I can take or leave most waters. Tap water, on the other hand, can literally make me sick if it's not properly processed. I guess I'm spoiled since I grew up on Lake Michigan.

[cimorene]

One time for a fic I was researching I was reading a review of an aged Scotch, and it was possibly the least believable wine-taster-type description I've ever seen.

Also there was a great episode of Northern Exposure where Shelly accidentally destroyed a priceless bottle of wine and then got some friends to help her fake it. They added all kinds of stupid things, including peat moss for "earthiness".

[dorothy1901]

There was an episode of Black Books with a similar plot. Manny and Bernard drank an extremely expensive bottle of wine that was meant to be a gift for the Pope. They refilled the bottle with all kinds of stuff. The Pope got very sick, poor guy.