when you just want to throw everything away, including not only furniture but also rooms

[cimorene]

Do you ever start to think that there are too many floors and walls and objects and surfaces in your dwelling and that's why you always feel like you can't keep it all clean enough, because you don't have time?

And then start thinking, Well, how much stuff would be the right amount of stuff? How many square feet?

And end up determining that like, it doesn't have to be as small as a studio apartment, because it's okay to have a bedroom, but like, really the most space you and your partner have enough energy and organization to keep tidy enough that it doesn't bug the FUCK out of you and clean enough that it doesn't depress you would be like... 65 square meters (about 700 square feet) but preferably less?

(Our flat in downtown Turku was that size, but honestly I think it was slightly too big. Our last flat before we moved to Pargas, the one that was way nicer, had a spare room, and a spare room was already DEFINITIVELY way too much space for stuff and consequently too much stuff. Honestly our first flat when I moved to Finland, where we only lived for a year, was like 45m - less than 500 square feet - and that was definitely cramped in terms of trying to arrange the furniture, but it was a good size! It was a size that wasn't a strain to clean.)

Obviously our house now has way more stuff in it, as well as more rooms. The area of JUST the downstairs would be manageable, but that isn't practical obvs. Throwing away a bunch of furniture and stuff would HELP, since it's easier to clean a room without stuff in it, but (a) we both have ADHD so a room that doesn't have stuff in it will just fill up with clutter if it's not hermetically sealed and (b) it's still too many floors and walls! And floors and walls get dusty!

We did work hard to declutter and threw away a lot of stuff last summer, but I still find the crowdedness (due to the ratio of furniture to floor) oppressive and conducive to ADHD Impossible To Clean This syndrome.

I fantasize regularly about living in a little apartment but with our current nice big kitchen.

Comments

[princessofgeeks]

Wishing you the space and time to placidly declutter and organize your current home to your liking.

You have really had a rough couple of years.

[cimorene]

I was about to say that haven't been roughER, but I guess that's not true. Even though the pandemic was harrowing! But there was a lull in between there before cat divorce where we were both really good. Ok top of laundry and dishes, cooking together, Wax regularly trying new cake recipes, I was knitting productively... the difference was larger than I'm used to thinking about.

[princessofgeeks]

Yes, between Anubis and your current problems, plus losing Snookums and that process, it's been rough. You all are so kind and do the utmost for your animals. It's quite amazing. Plus all your stupid job stress! Take care of yourselves.

[cimorene]

Yeah... really ever since we first brought Anubis here when the beginning of cat divorce and cat drama we have been just sort of grimly hanging on there, with no ability to get ourselves together or relax🫤

[princessofgeeks]

Yes, exactly. It's been very hard.

Take care. Treat yourselves as well as you treat your beloved pets.

[cimorene]

❤️

[shaggy]

I lived in a 745 sq ft condo for about a decade and it was completely doable, and certainly more environmentally sustainable for a single person, but there were things that I definitely missed having and prioritized when I was buying my current home. Pantry space for both food and small appliances, a guest room, storage for Christmas decorations and other odds and ends.

My house is 1,500 sq ft on the main floor and it’s much more comfortable. I have a dedicated office which is nice for WFH. There’s another 800 in the basement that is mostly unused except for my extra storage space.

[cimorene]

I've never been happy with our kitchen before, and I had control over this one completely. I regret some of our choices, but the layout and the design at least are as good as they can get.

But I often find myself lying around wishing I could keep our new kitchen and bathroom but reduce the rest of our living space as much as possible.

[laurenthemself]

I keep looking at all my books and wondering if I need to do a truly ruthless purge. I've got to have over 2000 books, if not over 3000 by now, and so many of them I'm clinging to out of nostalgia.

Then I remember it takes me a solid month to put away my clean laundry each time and realise I am unlikely to do a grand book purge.

[cimorene]

We have purged our book collection several times over the years, and we don't have a storage problem with them anymore, I'm happy to say! But we do actually have books that we have no interest in because they were given to us or they were my MIL's. Now that we live in a small town, though, there's nowhere convenient to donate them.

My parents took several years to declutter their book collection before moving in with my sister in another state. Maybe that gradual strategy could work for you.

[krait]

I like the size of my house - wouldn't mind it being larger, actually - and mostly just fantasise about being able to pay someone else to clean it. :D

A huge winnowing of all the accumulated clothing is definitely overdue, though!

[cimorene]

Oh no, you reminded me😂 I only have executive function for a certain amount of decluttering per year!!